Happy 2012!

Yesterday was a bitter sweet day for me.  It marked one year since we found out we were pregnant for the first time and it marked the last day of a 2011.  2011 was a year of complicated emotions and trying times.  But instead of focusing on the negative aspects of the year I'd like to focus on the positive that has come from it.

I have found out that I am a much stronger and resilient person than I ever thought possible.  There were many times in the first half of the year where I felt I had reached my breaking point, I couldn't take anything else.  But I continued on.  I changed and grew.  I'd like to think that I'm a more compassionate and empathetic person now as a result of all the struggles.

I have an even closer relationship with Andy.  I was in love with him a year ago but I can honestly say that I'm even more so today.  He has been my rock and I know I can depend on him for anything.  He's been my partner in every sense of the word throughout this journey.  I think he has grown and changed a lot this year too.  I used to be the strict planner/organizer of our relationship while Andy was the happy go lucky go with the flow guy.  This year has taught me to relax more and I think it's taught Andy to plan more.  Funny how that works.

I have a relationship with God.  I hate to say it but I don't know if I would have found Him if not for the sadness of 2011.  I have taken Him for granted my whole life.  I needed something to rely on for strength and found it in God.  It's not that God is new to me, it's that for the first time I allowed myself to believe and understand the power of His love.  I allowed myself to accept it and experience it.

Last, but obviously not least, our twins.  They are by far the largest blessing I have ever been given and I am so incredibly thankful for them each and every day.  They are worth every heartbreak and tear that we went through to get here.  Now they just need to continue baking for at least 22 more weeks!

I'm looking forward to an even better 2012!  Our next OB appointment is in a week, our best friends are getting married the following day, our anatomy scan is the 25th, I'll be having a work shower sometime at the end of February/beginning of March, and our babies should be here at the end of May.  What's not to be excited about?  Welcome 2012!